image depicting a
hamilton-themed hat of my own contrivance,
consisting chiefly of repurposed hockey legging,
subtly evocative of steeler logo, thus also incidentally continuant of said motif,
contrived by me this morning then worn by same
whilst walking to work in -27 degrees celsius (with windchill) conditions,
with snow, for 1 hr,
whilst simultaneously experiencing
onset of temporary and unplanned selective serotonin-norepinephrine reuptake inhibitor discontinuation syndrome

If we have learned nothing else from the twentieth century, we should at least have grasped that the more perfect the answer, the more terrifying its consequences. Imperfect improvements upon unsatisfactory circumstances are the best that we can hope for, and probably all we should seek. Others have spent the last three decades methodically unraveling and destabilizing those same improvements: this should make us much angrier than we are./Tony Judt (1948-2010)/NYRB/Dec 17 2009


There is nothing mysterious about this process: it was well described by Edmund Burke in his critique of the French Revolution.  Any society, he wrote in Reflections on the Revolution in France, which destroys the fabric of its state, must soon be 'disconnected into the dust and powder of individuality'.  By eviscerating public services and reducing them to a network of farmed-out private providers, we have  begun to dismantle the fabric of the state.  As for the dust and powder of individuality: it resembles nothing so much as Hobbes's war of all against all, in which life for many people has once again become solitary, poor and more than a little nasty./Tony Judt (1948-2010)/Ill Fares the Land/2010

5 cathedral interiors and
1 exterior

handicraft

according to this dollar store thermometer
the floor level temperature inside my apartment
is 15 degrees celsius

token image continuant of steeler motif

mosefolket: jernalderens mennesker bevaret i 2000 år
(bog people: iron age man preserved for 2000 years)
/peter vilhelm glob (1911-1985)



>>>yet they were made of earth and fire as we,
>>>the selfsame forces set us in our mould:
>>>to life we woke from all that makes the past.
>>>we grow on death's tree as ephemeral flowers.

/thøger larsen (1875-1928)

this is no longer a website about kilju

henceforth it shall be a website about steeler

>>>it is my blood,
>>>thus mine to give.
>>>they will take and eat,
>>>if it in fullness cometh.
>>>we have come unkinned.

>>>wolf is on one isle,

>>>and i upon another.
>>>fast is isle
>>>with fen begirt,
>>>death-wild men
>>>upon it.
>>>they will take and eat,
>>>if it in fullness cometh.
>>>we have come unkinned.
>>>what wolf has taken,
>>>hopes hunt houndlike.

>>>when it was rainy weather
>>>and i wailing sat,

>>>and was in warstrong
>>>arms enwrapped,
>>>took i some joy,
>>>but took i sadness also.

>>>wolf, my wolf!
>>>my hope flies to thee.
>>>laid waste am i
>>>by thy seldom-coming,
>>>not want of meat,
>>>but by sorrowed heart.

>>>hearest thou watchman?
>>>our wretched whelp

>>>a wolf beareth
>>>to woodland.
>>>with ease one splitteth
>>>what was never seamed.
>>>our song together.


shook things up a little with this version
minimalized it
dropped a lot of syllables
abandoned several literal translations of certain words/phrases
(where it seemed acceptable to do so)
in favour of ones that made better sense
eg. changing "sick" to "laid waste"
to better reflect "want of meat"
also, "hope flies to thee" etc.
and most jarringly perhaps
the whole "my blood/they will eat if it in fullness cometh" thing
a more figurative/suggestive way of evoking the sacrifice-element
note that "threat" becomes "fullness"
ie. "spate" or "flood"
ie. her blood goes to them in spate
ie. they will accept it if it comes in sufficient quantity
yes i am really grasping here
 



also, went with the alternate line-break scheme 
thought that short lines/clipped rhythms better conveyed starkness of original
a certain rawness

but now
after thinking about it and consulting nb at great length
discussing it with him in person and via email
i am having another change of heart

nb takes issue with the "luxury of the pause"
created by the short lines
he feels that it "reduces the action"
he is drawn to the "cadence and movement" of version 1
and "where the breath is taken"
he feels, for this and other reasons,
version 2 does not hit as deep


after looking at it while considering nb's input
i feel very strongly that he is correct
i begin to realize
the "disorienting grief" is not expressed as fully here
for any number of possible reasons
but most likely: attempting to move the poem away from its indigenous ambiguity
is in effect to emotionally neutralize it
also, importantly:
the wildness/farflungness is definitely better suited to longer lines
the elegiac quality, esp in the last 4 lines
"hearest thou watchman?" (the despair thereof) needs a full long breath like a crying-out or a howl
that is the "rēotugu", the wailing
"þonne hit wæs rēnig weder ond ic rēotugu sæt"


 (when it was rainy weather and i wailing sat)

i think there are some elements of version 2 that i will want to carry on
but ultimately version 1 may be a better template
at least in terms of cadence/breath

nb: "i think you do well to trust your gut
when bridging those loose grammatical lines or not bridging them.
holy shit, i just realized how clear it is that the poem provides its own key
for us would-be exegetes and translators:
with ease we split what was never seamed / our song together.
you create difficulty when you try to mend the world."



more to follow

more re wolf and edie:

5 problem lines/phrases/words

and possible solutions/interpretations:

1

lēodum is mīnum swylce him mon lāc gife
(persons is mine should they one offering/game give)

this, the first line, remains most problematic for me personally

even after reading and rereading several times 

and thinking about it constantly for several days consecutively

the original is frustratingly unclear

there seem to be 2 distinct ideas: "my people" and "a sacrifice is required"

but nothing to suggest how or why the 2 ideas are connected

or even if they are at all 

the translator is left to his own devices here 

i have arrived at this, provisionally:

"it is my blood, thus mine to give"

it reflects my first impression of the line's meaning upon first gloss

ie. she had a people (or a blood/bloodline/heritage/kin)

but she would give them up if she had to,

pain of loss notwithstanding

this interpretation diverges radically from the others i have seen

but really you could go in any direction with this line, i think

fortunately i don't know enough about anglo saxon grammar to stop myself

her people ask for a sacrifice?

her people are the sacrifice?

both?

etc

2

āþecgan

(accept)

this word is usually translated as either accept or kill

two words which seem to be in direct contradiction in this context

until one thinks of acceptance in terms of "taking" or "taking in" or "eating"

then one realizes that to accept could also be to kill

also one becomes aware of additional sexual connotations of the word "take"

and possible intersections of sex/killing concepts

or sex/eating

3

on þrēat cymeð
(in threat cometh)

þrēat is translated variously as threat/clan/crowd

on could mean in, or into

so he could be "coming in threat" ie threateningly

or he could be "coming into a threat" ie into danger

or he could be "coming in a crowd/throng"

or he could be "coming into a crowd/throng/clan"

again i think you could go in any direction with this one

4

ungelīce is ūs

(unlike/unalike is us)

maybe the most annoying line in the poem

so clipped and blunt

half-line, "odd line out"

and so hard to understand or appreciate

un=un

gelic/lic=alike/like

but then i discover that lic can also mean body

as in corpse/corpus/corporeal/incorporated

this opens out into ideas of family/blood/kin/kind

and changes my understanding of the word like

and it becomes the concept "likeness"

with its suggestion of family and lineage and kin concepts

as in "we are unlikenessed" or

"we are unkinned"

or "unkind"?

(a "kind" being a likeness, a type, a related group, a category

thus unkind could mean "unalike" or not-related)

thus: "we have come unkinned"?

5

wulfes ic mīnes wīdlāstum wēnum dogode
(wolf i mine wide-walking/wide-tracking hope dog-like)

wulfes is possessive, meaning: what wolf has/what wolf has taken/that which is wolf's
wēnum is plural of hope

her hopes "dog" the runaway wolf like a pack of hunting hounds, as in a fox hunt?
note: dogode is disputed by scholars

it is commonly emended to to hogode

due to dogode being otherwise completely unattested in the anglo saxon canon

hogode means: thought (past 1st person singular)

i for one accept dogode as it appears in the ms. 

preferring to believe that whoever wrote it down

knew how to spell 

how about: "that which is wolf's" i [with] mine far-flung hopes "hunt houndlike"

why not eh

i know eh

more to follow

"behold, the noise of the bruit is come,
and a great commotion out of the north country."

/lamentation (biblical)

another one from the codex exoniensis
commonly called "wolf and eadwacer"

this was my first gloss:

>>>lēodum is mīnum swylce him mon lāc gife
>>>persons is mine should they one offering/game give

>>>willað hȳ hine āþecgan gif hē on þrēat cymeð
>>>willeth they he accept/take/eat if he in threat cometh

>>>ungelīc is ūs
>>>unlike is us

>>>wulf is on īege, ic on ōþerre
>>>wolf is on isle, i on other

>>>fæst is þæt ēglond, fenne biworpen
>>>fast is that island fen be-woven/surrounded

>>>sindon wælrēowe weras þǣr on īge
>>>be death-wild/deadly men there on isle

>>>willað hȳ hine āþecgan gif hē on þrēat cymeð
>>>willeth they he accept/take/eat if he in threat cometh

>>>ungelīce is ūs
>>>unlike is me

>>>wulfes ic mīnes wīdlāstum wēnum dogode
>>>wolf i mine wide-walking/wide-tracking hope dog-like

>>>þonne hit wæs rēnig weder ond ic rēotugu sæt
>>>then it was rainy weather and i wailing sat

>>>þonne mec se beaducāfa bōgum bilegde
>>>then i those battlebrave/battlestrong arms surrounded

>>>wæs mē wyn tō þon, wæs mē hwæþre ēac lāð
>>>was me joy to that, was me however also loth

>>>wulf, mīn wulf! wēna mē þīne
>>>wolf, mine wolf! hope me thine

>>>sēoce gedydon þīne seldcymas
>>>sick did thine seldom-coming

>>>murnende mōd nales metelīste
>>>uneasy mind not meatlessness/meat-lack

>>>gehȳrest þū, eadwacer? uncerne earme hwelp
>>>hearest thou, wealth-watcher? our wretched whelp

>>>bireð wulf tō wuda
>>>beareth wolf to wood

>>>Þæt mon ēaþe tōslīteð þætte nǣfre gesomnad wæs
>>>that one easily slitteth, that never seamed was

>>>uncer giedd geador
>>>our song together

and my first attempt at interpretation:

>>>my people demand an offering.
>>>willeth they to eat him if he in threat cometh.
>>>we are not alike.

>>>wolf is on one isle, i am on another.
>>>fast is that island with fen begirded,
>>>it is an isle of death-wild men.
>>>willeth they to eat him if he in threat cometh.
>>>we are not alike.

>>>the wolf my far-wandering hope tracks hound-like.

>>>when it was rainy weather and i wailing sat,

>>>i was by war-strong arms enwrapped.

>>>it was a joy to me, loth however also was i.

>>>wolf, my wolf! my hope goes after thee.
>>>i am made sick by thine seldom-coming,

>>>by troubled mind, not by want of meat.

>>>hearest thou, watchman? our wretched whelp
>>>the wolf beareth to woodland.

>>>with ease one splitteth what was never seamed.

>>>our song together.

it's hard to sort through all the interpretations

is wolf a man's name or is it an actual wolf?

is eadwacer a man's name or merely a generic term for watchman?

i would like to see a translation that preserves as much of the ambiguity as possible

nevertheless i am beginning to think it is impossible to render it in modern english

at least without at least a few leaps

certainly the narrator is a female, that is accepted

woman + man + infant?

woman + 2 men + infant?

what of the idea that all the characters are non-human?

as in animals + a deity, (deity in this case being eadwacer)
this lends "hearest thou watchman?" a strongly confrontational tone

as in a "god my god why hast thou forsaken me?" kind of thing

and the poem as a whole a certain feral aspect

as if it weren't woolly enough to begin with

what with suggestions of human sacrifice

and/or cannabalism and

pain and loneliness

etc  

more to follow